Happiness is a state of mind.
Ever heard that quote before? It implies that- as long as you think it, you can be it. It meaning happiness. The simple yet hard to achieve emotion. Joy.
Not to be pessimistic here (it’s not my style) but it’s obviously not that easy. At least not to think about in that way. For one, I’m sure there’d be a lot less depressed people in the world, young and old, if they simply wanted and could make the simple choice to be happy. Who makes the conscious choice to be sad, if they have the ability to choose otherwise?
Feeling happy is something we’ve all experienced, whether a small surge of joy at getting a gift or maybe just smiling at a joke someone told us. Maybe the better thing we need to talk about is being content. It’s listed as a synonym of happiness if you look at dictionary.com, but in reality, they’re two different feelings. For one, you can be content and still feel sad. And, being content really is a state of mind. But how do you achieve it?
For starters, you have to figure out what makes you the most content. Or, happy. For me, that’s feeling busy and accomplished, or things going according to plan. If I figure that out, then I can figure out what I can do to stay busy. What I can do to make sure things go according to plan when I’m in charge. I can make sure I’m not bored. Things can go according to plan only if I make a plan, so I make sure to try and be as organized as possible. I’m always proud of myself when I spend a little time organizing myself which helps me out in the long run.
So what is that for you? What does being happy mean to you? Now, the line between content and happiness is often blurred, because when we’re content, it’s so much easier to convince ourselves to be happy with the small things. Then, happiness really does become a mindset.
There are so many studies that show being grateful or simply reminding yourself to be grateful increases happiness. Why? I’m no phycologist, but if we continue to remind ourselves that we have so much, we realize there’s no real reason to be anything but happy. So much of our disappointment is just derived from feeling like we don’t win enough. We don’t have enough. We’re always striving for something more- whether an award or physically saving money for something special. And that’s okay! Being grateful doesn’t mean we have to stop ourselves from ever getting something new, it just means not to forget about all the things you already might have.
Right now, think about three things you’re grateful for. Anything. The hundred on your test, the new bike you got, or the dinner you had last night. Can you list anything else? Do it. Write it down. Say it aloud! I’m so grateful for…. If you do this often enough, you’ll realize that, in reality, that little tiny thing that ‘ruined your day’ was nothing compared to all the good things that also happened. Our brains are almost trained to just see the bad part in everything. Even if the good is bigger! You could have a perfect morning, average afternoon, and then five minutes of disappointment, and call it a bad day. Fine. But what does that do for you? You’re labeling this whole day as nothing accomplished. You’re setting your mood for the rest of the day, ruining any chances of turning the it back around. But how do you fix that? It’s automatic, I know. For me, I like to sit down, take a deep breath, and… in my head, list everything that’s gone wrong that day. I know, it sounds like the opposite of the message I’m trying to get across. But for me, it helps me see that what I thought as the worst day of my life was really just two things that were nagging me. If you think your day’s been rotten, try and do the same. Figure out what’s really making you upset, whether one or two things like it is most of the time, or even a longer list.
Which brings me to my next point. Listen to your emotions. You do not have any obligation to be happy all of the time. It’s completely okay to feel sad. Don’t feel like you have to always be happy, always looking on the bright side. There’s nothing wrong with you if you’re upset, or if these tips don’t work for you. It’s perfectly natural to cry, to get mad, to feel down. But if feeling those things are stopping you from enjoying your life, sit down and half a talk with yourself (mentally, if you prefer). If you’re having trouble getting out of a slump or something, and you aren’t sure why, then ask yourself what’s wrong. Be kind with yourself, always. Be patient. Ask yourself what you could have done, or seen, to make you feel that way. Did something upset you that you brushed off at the time, and now it’s coming back to haunt you? Personally, I hate not having closure. Or who knows? Maybe you’re just hungry. Either way, you’ll never know if you don’t ask yourself.
Learning to be content really is a skill that you’ll get better at over time. There’s no blueprint to happiness, and there’s no one thing that works for everyone. Really, there isn’t a secret to being happy, rather we all already have the ability inside us, it just needs to be unlocked.
Hey guys! Sorry I’ve been gone for so long, my blog was glitching. Happy June! I’m thinking of starting a program of sorts in which I will send emails over the course of a month or so in which I will walk you through the steps to set up your google calendar for success in task batching.
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